Facing Separation
     Maybe it is time for the love to have an end. We become more and more alienative, stranger and atranger. We have few words when chatting in QQ. The scene that we talked all night long as you said and I followed won’t appear again.
     The role of the third person was essentially questionable. Ordinarily spesking, it won’t last long. I can only comfort myself like this. I am just a flag of his searching for stimulation.
     I make great efforts to recall myself who I have never loved. I like being in a daze and listening to love songs with all my heart. I feel a bit blue or disconsolate. However, my smile is still pure. I have got lots of scars after rolling in the love circle. At this moment, I feel a little painful as if the old wound is dilacerated when I listen to these songs again. It has been a long time since the last emotion’s appearence. I have used all my emotion to love and sacrifice. But what I get is betraying. All the promises have become a joke with the passing of time. The man who promised to protect me all the time has leave me easily. Promise is a weapon for deceiving love and trust. I have been beaten strongly.
      Our generation has too many opportunities to experience love. We are easy to love somebody,easy to be hurt and even easier to leave one person and then fall in love with another so as to fetch our previous distress from others.
     Just like enjoying the pleasure of abandon, I have been abandoned, meanwhile I have discarded others. That is a vicious circle. Gradually, I find that I don’t burst into tears any longer when I depart from an emotion. But I feel tired in my heart.
Therefore, I become numb,become cold-hearted. Deciding to stop even when in a hot period. We can’t find a safe harbour just for the sake of this. We want to find a bailment once feeling tired. But maybe that man hasn’t shown up yet, or we are searching for the other half who was thrown away by Eve. Ourselves become scarfull and on longer perfect when we find out.
I know that you don’t matter, so you won’t be aware of our breaking up soon. What we own is only memory. I won’t be in your room or near you when awake.
I like the perfume of the scarttered lemons very much, which is slipslop and your smell of tobacco. I always wake up in the morning in such warm smells. But now I can ony recall. I can still remember that the last time I leave the house is a busy morning. I was hurried to go to work and you were hurried to travel for business. You exhorted me to come back earlier. It was so warm that I had the feeling of beeing at home. Do you know at that time I eagered to tell you: Even the air is so sweet when I am with you. I didn’t say like this eventually.
I was really very happy when I was with you. I have got more and more careful about you, and more and more dependent on you. I am fear that this dependence would become love, deep love. And I will lose myself. I will lose way and be hurt in your love forest. I don't like to and I can’t bear such me. So I make up my mind for I have no other way to choose. You have never promised me anything. You said happiness is the most important. I know clearly that you can’t give me a good future. Now it is time to say goodbye…
Meteor shower of Perseus have tested our true love. It is the nicest memory that I will cherish when we watched meteor shower…

(Translation/Meng Xiaoli )

Source : Women’s Home Club Nvxing.com